I do not know how to start this one. I am truly at a loss for words in my most recent scenario, yet compelled to share it with you.
It all started in the city of Akron. Land of LeBron James. We were there for a Track and Field meet and were relaxing in the hotel.
After some quality time and teammate bonding with Chan "The Love Man" Brown, I felt it was necessary to run away, so I began to run. I was approaching the elevator and ran into everyone's favorite 400 meter hurdler Brooklynn Ventura. She was going on the same elevator, so we entered. I pressed "Door Close" so Mr. Brown couldn't get on, but as they closed and I turned around, he was right behind me, smiling as if I was his next victim.
The following is a detailed description of the next hour and a half of my life. This is all based on true events.
As in any elevator trip, everyone pressed the respective floor they were going to. The only difference in this trip was that the elevator apparently picked a floor too. I didn't see the button it pressed but the sudden drop of the elevator was a slight sign. We all looked at each other and immediately knew something was wrong. We felt no movement and heard no sounds. Were we stuck on the elevator? Not even in my wildest dreams has this happened, but yes, we were stuck on the elevator between the 3rd and 2nd floors.
The first one to fall victim to the emotion of panic, too many peoples surprise...Brooklynn. Approximately 1 minute after we discovered that we were stuck, Ms. Ventura had already had enough. It also didn't help that she had to use the bathroom, developing a disruptive sensation for poor Ms. Ventura and unleashing was is often referred to as "Angry Brooklynn".
In the midst of Brooklynn's newly acquired rage, Mr. Brown, calmly picked up the emergency phone and spoke to a representative at the front desk. He peacefully asked for assistance and politely thanked them for their help. This is when it sunk in that I was stuck in an elevator and did not know when I was getting out.
According to Brooklynn, she still had to use the bathroom.
We sat in the elevator waiting for a few minutes until we heard voices. Excited and energized, we all stood up, hoping our adventure was over. It was our loving teammates. They all came to the door asking about Brooklynn's safety and ensuring that she was okay. They asked how she was doing and made sure that nothing had happened to her. Nothing was asked about Chandler or I, putting a huge dent in our self-esteem and sense of security. Well there was a dent in mine to say the least.
For the next 15 minutes, each individual teammate asked the following. "Are you stuck in the elevator?" Yes we were, and it hasn't changed since the first person who asked, so quite frankly the repetition was increasingly aggravating. When our teammates left finally, there was a brief moment of panic spotted in "The Love Man" Chan. He said, and I quote "That's it! I'm busting out of this elevator!" I looked on as I watched him transform into a ferocious Andrew-like specimen. He approached the doors, let out an almighty roar, and began to slide open the doors. My mouth dropped as did my heart. The "joy" of "teammate bonding" had just increased to an unimaginable level.
What seemed like our way out was only a false alarm, as there was another door that could not be opened so we were back at square one. To make matters even worse, our teammates came back. This time with a cop who informed us that we had to wait another 30-45 minutes before someone could come to help us out. This was the worst news to hear when stuck in an elevator, because Brooklynn made sure we knew, at 5 minute increments, that she still had to use the bathroom.
We were trapped in the elevator, unsure of when we were to be released. As caged animals, we had minimal food sources (two half eaten Pasta Bowls from Domino's to be precise, which were later used as pillows), no interaction with anyone but each other, could only be spoken to through a tiny slit in the elevator door, and a slightly polluted air source (the polluter has not come forth yet). Delirium ensued.
Napping was amongst my first options, but after Chan and I discovered the measurements of the elevator, it was going to be too difficult to get comfortable. Also, once Chan was slashed by stray nails that decorated the walls of the elevator twice, I figured that my reckless sleeping habits could prove to be dangerous at this particular time. I tried meditation and prayer as a substitute, yet neither of which brought salvation to the elevator.
Singing was my next option, which was one of the lighter parts of the night. Chan and I sang a beautiful rendition of Shai/Boyz II Men's "If I Ever Fall in Love", as well as an accurate arrangement of "See You In My Nightmares" by Kanye West but the night was stolen by once again, none other than Brooklynn. She managed to squeeze her size 5 feet (give or take half a size) into Chan's size 10 wheat Timberland boots, stood up and performed Ke$ha's "Tik Tok". Using innovative dance moves not seen since the late and great King of Pop, Michael Jackson, she gave a performance that I will never in my life forget.
After some guest appearances by our Coaches, and a few more teammates, we remained trapped in the elevator. We had all came to (or at least Chan and I thought we came to) an understanding that our phones had lost service or had low battery at the beginning of this experience, so contact with the outer world was limited and rationed. Chan and I were given one call to my brother, while Brooklynn called two or three people and texted the night away. Can you guess whose phone lost service and had low battery?
Tired, exhausted, and frustrated, we had all come to the realization that we had involuntarily been given a new room for the night and there was nothing we could do about it. No one was coming to save us...ever. I started to reflex on my life and all the important things I have done. I thought about the first time I ever dunked a basketball. I thought about the first time I saw LeBron dunk. I thought about never having the chance to dunk on King Loic after being served numerous facials. Depression ensued, as I felt tears balled up in my eyes.
Then a voice. A voice came to me as if my prayers were being speed dialed back. A savior had come to rescue Brooklynn, Chandler and myself. The man told us to pull two red buttons that had been in the elevator the entire time and instantly the elevator began to move. Why we needed to wait an hour and a half for this was beyond me, but we were free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty, free at last.
The doors opened and we rushed out of them like deranged fans, eager to see the 8 anonymous strangers wondering why the elevator was not answering their requests to go upstairs. As they looked confused and bewildered, we told them that we had been stuck on the elevator for an hour and a half. They looked at all three of us as we went back to our rooms, and proceeded to enter the elevator despite our warning. I guess they were feeling daring, but that was not my problem. I had already paid my dues.
I look back at this night and truly am shocked that it actually happened. In contrast it has made its way into the realm of the most eventful nights of my life and I surely don't think it would be possible for me to forget it. I must thank my teammates Brooklynn Ventura and Chandler Brown for making this experience much more entertaining and bearable. We should do this again sometime. It was good, wholesome fun. To my monsters reading at home, I hope you enjoyed yourselves and that you get to experience such a time in your own lives. My one request is to make sure I am not with you. As always, until next time I'm starting with the Man in the Mirror.
Long Live The Prince
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