The Prince is back.
I would first like to formally apologize for the hiatus that I was on. It was not you at all as I love my little monsters dearly, it was me. I decided that going on a little bit of a vacation would channel some of those potent chemicals that instantly drug viewers upon reading those doctrines called Club SEBU posts. I am aware that the posts are highly addictive and many of you may have gone through some early stages of withdrawal and once again I am sorry. I hope you can accept this apology.
Time to dust of the cobwebs and see if I can still do this. Welcome back monsters.
So as usual, I will set the stage before I perform. About a week ago, I was boarding the bus. Now for those of you who are familiar with my Club, you will know that I have mastered the artistry that is behind boarding a bus. Here is where the discrepancy lies. Initially, I wanted people to read my posts and learn from them. I changed my mind because someone used my tactics against me and I can't have that. Anyways, join me as I return to the scenario.
I approached the bus stop, late as usual and saw that the snakes were already out and the bus was on its way. I was in an awful position. It was looking like I was going to either stand or walk in the relentless winter season. As I heard the bus and felt shivers down my spine, I knew that Richard Prince Sebuharara was not walking outside.
My mind started to race and I felt a bit of fear. I was so far from the bus and there was no way for me to reach the front without being slightly rude. I had to revert back to my prior knowledge. The date was January 15, 2010 when I published one of the best Club SEBU posts of all-time "The Art of Bus-Boarding" and I was going to have to dig in the archives for guidance. Although the chances of me getting on the bus were grim, it was time for me to showcase my talents in bus-boarding yet again. I proceeded towards the bus.
As I walked to the bus, it seemed more like walking through a battlefield. All sorts of food left astray littered the ground and decorated the soles of my Chuck Taylors, knees and feet battered then slashed my shins and toes, while bookbags and elbow found an innate attraction to my chest and midsection.
Through all this modern warfare, I was making great progress. I was only about two steps from destiny. Although sitting was out of the equation, the ultimate goal was to make sure that I did not have to endure the harsh reigns of Ms. Mother Nature and at the looks of things, I was going to be successful. One thing served as an obstacle in my operation.
As our paths converged at the exit of the jungle, I made brief eye contact with a littler female. Eye contact is one of the deadly sins of bus-boarding. I had a slight advantage on her, so I decided it was my obligation to make my way onto the bus first to secure a position for myself. The following scene may be graphic for some so viewer's discretion is advised.
Looking back at the situation I am terribly ashamed but what's done is done. With the step I had gained on her, I decided that I would extend my leg, drop down and execute a perfectly legal "Box Out" (see The Art of Bus-Boarding for definition). Yes, I am aware that I am a horrible person for my action, but trust me when I say this...the story gets better.
In my eyes, I had established my territory. Unfortunately for me, the girl had other motives. When I felt comfortable enough to walk on to the bus, tragedy struck. The same little girl who I thought was out of the picture decided to take a hockey player's mentality and checked me right out of contention. Yes I said it and yes I can't believe it either. With thousands of emotions running through my head I did not know what else I could do but move out of the way. This girl deserved her spot on the bus more than I did. She was clearly hungrier than I was and I applaud her for her efforts. As embarrassing as it was, I learned a valuable lesson. One that I will take with me to my grave. Do not judge a book by its cover, or you will get checked out of the way.
I hope your view of me has not been altered too much as I am much tougher than this story states. Don't try anything funny or you will regret it. Thank you for welcoming me back with open arms and I hope you enjoyed yourselves. It feels good to be home. Until next time take my picture Hollywood, I wanna be a star.
Long Live The Prince
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